Sorry, I didn’t mean to scare you like that. What’s that? You’re not scared? How can you not be? I flashed a big scary picture on the screen. That’s horror, right? Now, before I get on a tangent about my alleged film elitism (I watched The Ring once and it only ruined my life a little bit) let’s talk about the subjectivity of horror. I get that this may be a contradiction to what I was suggesting a couple sentences ago, but really horror is subjective. Anyone can find anything scary. Whether that’s a dark basement, a spider, heck I used to have a deathly fear of water. It’s a long story. Anyways, it’s impossible to design a movie that can scare everyone in the entire world. This variability makes it really hard for filmmakers to get the audience to feel anything, and that’s not just limited to fear. Y’know, if only there were a simple solution to all of this. Some.. some shortcut we can just flash on screen that would

Ohh right. I forgot about that. Yeah, that works! Now that we have a formula down, surely we can scare everyone at once with this newfound technology! Some may call it cheap and overused, but there’s nothing like a one size fits all solution! (Is what I would say if I was a really bad businessman.) All in all, jumpscares feel more like a cheap solution to a tricky problem, and I wish that Hollywood producers would stop using them.