Flour Babies: And What This Could Mean For the Next Generation

Image by Bilal Siddiqui

Image by Bilal Siddiqui

By Bilal Siddiqi, Staff Writer

This week has been very interesting for Freehold Boro students. Health teachers across the school decided to take inspiration from “Diary of a Wimpy Kid”, and gave out an assignment to watch over either an egg or a sack of flour. While this assignment may seem somewhat silly, it says a lot about this generation of students. More specifically, this generation will go down to be some of the worst parents in history. 

The things I’ve seen this past week would make any suburban mom shiver in their scuffed Adidas shoes. I would rather not get into specifics, because if I did then this article would likely get taken down due to explicit material. However, let’s just say that I appreciate my mom much more now. We have an interview with [NAME CENSORED DUE TO PRIVACY REASONS] to discuss this even further.

ME: “So… what are your thoughts on this situation?”

[NAME CENSORED DUE TO PRIVACY REASONS]: “Man, I don’t even know. All I know is that I hate kids. I would never raise a kid. I hate them so much. I sure am glad this is anonymous or else I would get in some serious trouble for all of that, haha. I also hate all of my teachers, and I dare the officials to stop me.” 

Wow, I don’t know what to say, but I hope they catch this guy. He seems really dangerous. 

In other words, this generation is quite dangerous. Judging from the treatment of these flour bags, I say we shouldn’t allow any person from this high school to have children.